Holographic thinking
A client recently told me a story about one of her favorite bosses. The boss had received feedback from superiors that she says “thank you” too often to her team. The boss took in the feedback, thought about it after the meeting, and decided… that’s a bunch of bull. My client loves this story because it shows the power of knowing who you are and standing by your style, your personality, and your values. The boss could have easily taken in the feedback and reduced how often she thanks her team for their work. Instead she listened, thought about it, and decided it wasn’t for her.
Without realizing it, she was using a concept often referred to as Holographic thinking. I was first introduced to this concept in my coach training program. Holographic thinking involves assessing a situation from three angles: with your head (analytics, logic), your heart (emotions), and gut (instincts). It’s a helpful way to check ourselves, making sure we’re making well-rounded decisions. For example, if your first reaction is to follow your emotions, check in with your logic about the situation and what your gut is telling you too. In this scenario, her gut won out, and rightly so. But she still took the time to first assess the situation and take the feedback in, figure out what the motivation for the feedback was, and allowed herself to feel some righteous indignation about it. Then she listened to her gut and it told her clearly how to proceed.
In a corporate environment it’s not easy to do this. We can fall into the trap of taking any advice of our superiors as gospel, and assuming that doing what we’re told will help us grow professionally. Women especially are conditioned to assume superiors know all, and are often in the position of receiving unhelpful advice, compared to their male counterparts. It’s important to remember that those superiors are human too, and not all advice is good advice. You already have an amazing internal compass that knows what’s right. That compass was built over many experiences, and many lessons learned. Trust it.
